No this post is not about the One Direction song, guess again directioners. Actually, I was laying here thinking about how much all the little things really do matter. The small actions end up making the largest impact in the end if you look at every kind of relationship in existence, whether it’s family, best friends or soul mates. I wonder why that is? Well when someone is noticing each detail about me no matter how insignificant, all of my nervous habits, how I smile…it warms my heart. They’re watching me from a distance like I’m this majestic being or piece of art, undisturbed and beautiful. No stalker vibes here I hope. They notice every little thing that makes you smile, and in return want to do those things for you just to see you happy. Imagine that? I hope everyone has experienced the pleasure of this at some point in their lives, it has to be one of the few reasons I get out of bed in the morning still breathing, heart beating.
Not too long from now, some months ago, I sat completely alone in the school hallway at lunch, without much of an appetite. My reasoning for being by myself is that I had just been broken up with over the summer, so coming back I felt completely lost and scared. I wouldn’t bring lunch with me, I felt too sick and rather dizzy for food. However I would carry a notebook, so I could draw some stuff off of the top of my head to keep myself distracted from the reality that my anxiety liked to punch me in the gut with. I drew roses and tulips, it has always been my go to drawing, these flowers, so innocent and happy in their way. Both things in which I felt like I lost. My guy friend must have noticed since one of those days he handed me a picture of a tulip that he drew…he noticed me drawing them and could tell that I was depressed. He noticed I was alone and scared so he gave this drawing…little does he know how hard that hit me. I had someone who cared again, for the first time in a while. I still hold it with me all of the time, I don’t know what I’d do if I lost it. I’ve drawn plenty if flowers before, but this one is special…it’s from him.
Little things like that, just knowing that someone thought about you for even a second, if you really think about it, it hits you hard. A text just letting someone know you’re thinking about them, a kiss on the cheek, a walk around the park, a deep conversation, a long hug, buying food or making a gift, literally anything can change someone’s day. It sticks with them longer than anything else will.
I’ve learned to live for the small things, like my favorite song coming on the radio, singing and dancing along to them like no one’s watching, making it to school at just the right time, getting to see my friend in the morning, hot chocolate, long car rides, the sun shining, the stars at night, waving to a friend in the hallway, deep conversations that make me laugh and cry, smiling so bright I forget it’s raining. I’ve learned, if you live for those nice little parts of life, you’ll never have a bad day, there will always be something to look forward to. I try my hardest, I battle with depression, and in my own way this is how I’m putting up my fight. #Will you join the battle?